The one where I talk about my grandparents

I was going to do a Wordless Wednesday and post the pictures I took from our wonderful Saturday, but I searched for 15 minutes for the camera before remembering it was in the car. So I guess I’ll just talk….er…type?

My grandparents are old. I’ve written about them a few times, mostly my grandpa because of the fall he took back in July right before I had Kinley. They are old; grandpa is 92, grandma is 90. They lived in Texas for pretty much my dad’s entire life, and they planned to be there till they died. But let’s face it, they are old and my dad (their only child) lives here in Virginia. Eventually, after much fuss and fighting, they packed up and moved here, to be taken care of. And so, they’ve been here since the summer of 2007.

And after my grandpa getting cancer again (can’t remember what kind tho), his hearing fading fast, his memory fading even quicker, a fall or two for each, and my grandma suddenly having an intake of symptoms that point to Mesothelioma, we think it’s “time.”

At a doctor appointment last week my mom noticed my grandma’s hand swelling, which lead to an ultrasound on Monday, which discovered the blood clot that nothing can be done about. And even if there was something that could be done, she’s 90, does she really want to hold on any longer? So we’re preparing,  we’re discussing, we’re visiting, hoping soon she’ll be at peace enough to just. let. go. And after that? We take care of grandpa, because the man is seriously like a cockroach, in the best way. We thought he was “going” this weekend, and he’s bounced right back.

The waiting game is the hardest, everyday wondering when is it going to happen, is there time for all her grandchildren to come see her, or all the great-grandkids? When? It’s too hard to wait, I just wish we knew so we could better prepare, so my dad could be there by her side, like I know they both want. But all we get is “soon.”

I’m not going to tell you she was a wonderful mother, mother-in-law or grandmother or  that, regardless, we had a great relationship with her because we didn’t, but she’s still all those things. And that means she’s still a part of our lives. She is still one of only two grandparents living. My mom’s father died before I was born, and my mom’s mother died when I was in high school. There was no way my parents could be there when the time came (my mom’s family is from New Orleans), so I never went through this. The waiting and visiting, the questions and taking care of last minute affairs.

She wasn’t wonderfully, but she’s still ours. And all we get is “soon.”

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2 Responses

  1. Oh my, this is terrible. I was extremely close to all of my grandparents and I was devestated when each one passed. When my hubby’s last surviving grandparent passed away in April, he wasn’t deeply concerned about it at the time he found out. Simply because they were never really apart of each others lives. At the funeral, I saw the first break in his emotion as they closed the casket for the last time. He was sad because he didn’t know her like everyone else did. Plus, she, was still his grandma.
    I will be praying for all of you Pua. This is a terrible time indeed. If you need anything I’m here ok?

    • Thank you for all your thoughts and love. I didn’t think I would get too emotional, but as my mom told me of the conversation that passed between my grandparents, I could barely contain it.

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