A confession on a non-Saturday

I hate Jon Bon Jovi. Yes, I know, oh my god, this is a travesty. But seriously, I can. not. stand. him. I hate his face, his music, his voice. They all send me into a rage, and when forced to listen to him for any periods of time, I suddenly become an alcoholic. Jon Bon Jovi is the bane of my existence.

Poor Kevin Bacon. Poor, poor Kevin Bacon. He feels the wrath of this hatred. Why? Because when I was a little girl (I’ve hated Bon Jovi that long), I thought they were the same person. It took many, many years for me to learn there are two people who look like Bon Jovi, and by then, the damage was done.

I can’t watch Kevin Bacon movies, and when I inform people of this I get the same looks I get when I tell them I can’t listen to Bon Jovi music. “BUT WHY!?” Because he looks and reminds me of Bon Jovi. “WHAT’S WRONG WITH BON JOVI!?” Because his face irritates me and his voice feels like swallowing rocks; big, pointy, sharp rocks. And then the people I’m talking to promptly go and get their mob-sticks and flamed torches and proceed to hunt me as if I’m Frankenstein.

Perhaps I’m un-American. I mean, I hate Bon Jovi and Kevin Bacon, the posters boys of what America loves. I also don’t like ham. Maybe I really am French, it would explain a lot.

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3 Responses

  1. I love Bon Jovi. LOVE.
    That is all.

  2. Does anyone really like Bon Jovi or Kevin Bacon????? I actually sent Sirius an email last year begging them to stop playing the new Bon Jovi stuff, oh my goodness, it is awful. I never found him to be that good but he REALLY needs to retire now, even his new stuff reeks of the 80’s.

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