I kissed a girl and it wasn’t terrible.

On Wednesday, Virginia’s social services board voted to allow same-sex couples to adopt.

It lost 7-2.

Let me back up here and explain something. In Virginia, only married couples or single people (regardless of sexual orientation) can adopt. So, by default, gay couples are excluded. However, single people who want to adopt for a variety of reasons can.

That’s fine.

What I don’t understand is why we don’t allow unmarried couples of any type to adopt? If a couple has been together for 15 years, but isn’t married because; a) they can’t or b) they just don’t want to, and decide they want a child, why can’t they adopt if they so choose? Just because two people are not married, doesn’t mean they are any less dedicated. The state acknowledges a single parent’s ability to raise a child alone, why do they refuse to deny an unmarried couples ability to do the same?

Okay, for the sake of argument let’s put out there that if you’re unmarried, it’s easier to separate regardless of if children are involved or not. I don’t agree with that, as most people wouldn’t, but I know that’s how many people look at it, so let’s just put it on the table.

This leads me to ask, why do we not allow same-sex marriage? Can someone give me one really good reason?

Other than the fact that “God said it’s an abomination,” because I just don’t believe that. I’m pretty sure God also said “judge not lest ye be judged,” but a lot of people seem to forget that part.

I really don’t think it will destroy how sacred marriage is, considering 50% of all marriages end in divorce and there will be an affair 80% of the time in all marriages. Along with those numbers and the fact that it’s nearly impossible to put a number domestic abuse because so many cases go unreported, it’s safe to say marriage is hardly sacred. Let’s not forget to point out that if two gay men or women are allowed to marry, IT WON’T EFFECT YOUR CURRENT MARITAL STATUS AT ALL.

As a straight, married, mother of two gay marriage doesn’t make an impact on my life at all, except…

Except for the fact that not allowing gay marriage can make an impact on my life in years to come.

Let me break it down for you.

One in ten people identify themselves as homosexual. My parents have 15 grandchildren. I don’t like the number 15, so let’s just say that each of my parents’ children have one more child in their lifetime, that is 20 grandchildren. That means that there would (statistically) be two gay children in my family. It could be any variety of them, but it doesn’t matter. If one of my nephews wants to marry his partner of 5 years, then I really hope he asks for my help planning it because I have some great ideas involving silver hot pants for the wedding party and a drag queen named Daphne as the officiant. Or if Caitlin and her transgendered partner decide they want to have a baby, but want to adopt, I will be there wearing the gaudiest “Proud Grandma” sweater I can possibly find.

The important thing, to me, is the fact that they should have the opportunity to tell me to tone down my pride and excitement. They can’t do that if they aren’t legally allowed to even have those celebrations without leaving the state they live in. And it does bother me because I want nothing more for them to all be happy and proud of who they are. If society is telling them they are wrong for one reason or another, that does effect me. It does piss me off.

It doesn’t make a damn bit of difference to my marriage, but it does, potentially, make a difference to people who share the same blood as I do. I would rather any number of them be in a loving relationship with someone of the same-sex than to be hurt by infidelity or abuse, mentally, emotionally, or physically.

And that is something that is worth fighting for to me.


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